Hey Look! A Forest!

Well Happy New Year! I know, I know, we’re already three weeks in to it, but I’ve been MIA (on here at least) so Happy New Year to you and yours. I hope it’s starting out to be a spectacular year for you all.

It’s hard to believe, but we’re 80 days post-transplant. In some ways it seems like eons ago, but in some ways it feels like yesterday.  These first 90 days are the most critical of the post-transplant phase, and we’re gearing up for a busy couple of weeks, but the past couple months have been pretty low-key — considering. It’s been 50 days since we were able to move back home, and we’ve settled back into the routine of life pretty well.

In our discharge class before we were released down at the SCCA, they told us, “You’ve gone through this process so you can live. Yes, you have to exercise caution, but don’t go home and wrap yourself in a bubble.”  Christmas was kind of a reintroduction to life outside that bubble, being able to attend church together as a family for the first time in several months, and after laying low for most December we hit January running at full speed. Both of our kids are in basketball and between practices and games, it’s a 4-5 night a week operation for us. Throw in piano and guitar lessons, after-school clubs and mid-week church classes and yep, we’re running at full speed alright. Only for the first time in a long time, I don’t feel overwhelmed by it all.

It’s amazing how a little thing like cancer can change your perspective. And how your perspective changes when you’re forced to slow down and look, listen and feel things differently.

Caution: Trees obscuring view of forest next 5 miles.

I suppose I could still choose to fight it. But mostly I’m not. Don’t get me wrong, I still have a long way to go in learning to totally let go. But I’m making progress. I think I’m beginning to see the forest through all these darn trees, and I’ve accepted the single-use capes that are meant to be tattered and dirty at each day’s end. I may not necessarily like it. I may whine a bit (internally, mostly) that I want my cape to be shiny and pristine, but mostly I shrug it off with a, “meh…” and carry on. I don’t feel guilty for my “NOs” anymore. If I have to say “NO” to something, it’s less likely to be my family these days than it would have been a year ago.

And I’m pretty sure that’s a good thing.

This 10 day period we’re in is kind of a big deal. They do a total re-staging between 80-90 days post-transplant. It’s been long enough since the transplant that Corey’s body has kind of settled down from the shock and they’re able to get an accurate reading of how everything panned out. So, over these 10 days he’ll undergo a full body scan/x-ray, a MRI, lots of blood work and other kinds of labs, and he’ll cap it all off with a double bone marrow biopsy, which I’m pretty sure he won’t eat before. (If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you’ll have to read my previous post “Tattoos and ‘Told-You-So’s” for a good laugh on that subject…) All these tests will determine how successful the bone marrow transplant was, whether there’s any cancer left and, if so, what stage he’s at (as a reminder, he was initially diagnosed at stage two and there are only three stages to Multiple Myeloma).

I can honestly say I haven’t spent even a moment worrying about all the different “what ifs…” that could come from this re-staging. If there’s one lesson I’ve learned on this journey this past year it’s that the Lord will give me enough grace to get through today. So I will begin each day this couple weeks of testing, and each day the week of waiting that will follow, and then each day until our next appointment by strapping on those single-use capes, focusing on my people and my newly-realigned priorities and I will run my race, one step at a time, with the strength and peace that can only come from One greater than any other source. And I think that’s a pretty great way to start out a new year.

25 thoughts on “Hey Look! A Forest!

  1. New Year with New Perspectives
    God opens our eye to look at life differently after going through all of this
    ( I understand that first hand 🤚being a survivor)
    Let the smallest of things bring you your Greatest Joy.
    Praying for these next 10 days an all of Corey appointments.
    Hugs 🤗 Debi

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Lifting up prayers on your behalf to the Only One who can truly hear! Praying so that all will go well with the testing and that the treatment was a huge success!!!!!
    2 Samuel 22:7 In my distress I called upon the LORD, and cried to my God: and he did hear my voice out of his temple, and my cry did enter into his ears.

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  3. There is no other God or Rock. Turn to Him always! Am here praying right now!
    2 Samuel 22:31-33 As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is tried: he is a buckler to all them that trust in him. For who is God, save the LORD? and who is a rock, save our God? God is my strength and power: and he maketh my way perfect.

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  4. The Lord will get you through the hardest of times. Know that I’m here praying!
    Habakkuk 3:17-19 Although the fig tree shall not blossom, neither shall fruit be in the vines; the labour of the olive shall fail, and the fields shall yield no meat; the flock shall be cut off from the fold, and there shall be no herd in the stalls: Yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will joy in the God of my salvation. The LORD God is my strength, and he will make my feet like hinds’ feet, and he will make me to walk upon mine high places…

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  5. Lifting you up in prayer!
    Lamentations 3:21-23 This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. It is of the LORD’S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.

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  6. May these words sink deep down into your heart! Continuing to pray!
    Lamentations 3:57-58 Thou drewest near in the day that I called upon thee: thou saidst, Fear not. O Lord, thou hast pleaded the causes of my soul; thou hast redeemed my life.

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  7. May the Lord calm your soul and give you peace. Know that I’m here praying!
    Psalms 107:29-30 He maketh the storm a calm, so that the waves thereof are still. Then are they glad because they be quiet; so he bringeth them unto their desired haven.

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  8. The safest place you could ever be is in the arms of the Lord. Praying right now!
    Psalms 61:1-2 Hear my cry, O God; attend unto my prayer. From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee, when my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I.

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  9. Just reading these words can bring such a calm and peace! Praying so that you will always trust in His Almighty wings to keep you safe!
    Psalms 61:3-4 For thou hast been a shelter for me, and a strong tower from the enemy. I will abide in thy tabernacle for ever: I will trust in the covert of thy wings. Selah.

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  10. The Lord will get you through whatever you have to face. Lifting up prayer right now!
    Psalms 62:5-6 My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him. He only is my rock and my salvation: he is my defence; I shall not be moved.

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  11. Put your trust in the Lord. He will never let you down! Praying to our only Refuge!
    Psalms 62:7-8 In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God. Trust in him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us. Selah.

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  12. Such amazing words of comfort and promise for help in time of need! Praying!
    Psalms 27:4-5 One thing have I desired of the LORD, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the LORD, and to enquire in his temple. For in the time of trouble he shall hide me in his pavilion: in the secret of his tabernacle shall he hide me; he shall set me up upon a rock.

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